$ whoami
> mass-produces microservices and mass-consumes coffee ☕
- 🔧 Backend engineer who mass produces microservices faster than I can document them
- 📱 Flutter dev who still thinks "hot reload" is actual magic
- 🕸️ I talk to Neo4j more than I talk to people (it doesn't judge my queries)
- 🐘 PostgreSQL whisperer — yes, we have a relationship
- 🌴 Based in Goa — yes, I code from the beach (jk, 🏖️ + ⌨️ = 💀 sand everywhere)
- 🎯 2026 goal: Write code that doesn't summon demons at 3 AM
Just like my production bugs eat my weekends
Refactoring: code I wrote 2 weeks ago and don't recognize anymore
Coffee intake: concerning
Bugs created: 3
Bugs "fixed": 7 (net positive... that's how it works, right?)
Brain thoughts: "why did I write it like this"
Working from: somewhere with wifi and regrets- ✅ Made a microservice that outlived its documentation
- ✅ Successfully blamed DNS (it's always DNS)
- ✅ Wrote a Dockerfile that worked on first try (just kidding, took 47 attempts)
- ✅ Convinced myself "I'll add tests later"
- 🔲 Actually add tests later
"If it's stupid but it works, it's not stupid — it's legacy code"
